I’m Single and Happy…Why Does That Make Them So Mad?

I’m a single woman, no children. Been that way all my life. Over the years I’ve gotten lots of questions from curious people as to why this is so. I’m not a troll (so I’m told), and I have a reasonably pleasant personality, so lots of people don’t understand how this could be. That I’m okay (actually, happy) about this is really befuddling to more than just a few people. So, a little over a year ago, I started this blog, my musings about the realities and joys of being single and child-free.

So the good news is that The Spinsterlicious Life is starting to pop. In the last couple of months I’ve received lots of publicity — from a two-page spread in Woman’s Day magazine -to- a feature in the Lifestyle section on MSN.com –to- an interview on KABC Talk Radio, and I’ve been picked up by lots of online sites. It’s been fantastic.  

The less-than-good news is that with more publicity has come a weakening of my comfy, safe place. When I was writing just for my own blog and another site, Women’s Voices For Change,  I had interesting and reasoned dialogues with my readers. We were agreeable, even when we disagreed. I thought, “This blogging thing is nice. What a great way to hear and learn from other smart people!”

But as my exposure has broadened, it has brought out what I lovingly call the Crazies. It’s probably not nice for me to call people crazy, though I do think a few of them might be. Others are just rude. I am fascinated by that. What is it that makes them want to speak so impolitely to someone they don’t know, someone who has done nothing to them?

Part of me thinks it’s the new louder, in-your-face, “I’ll-take-you-down” culture so expertly supported by Reality TV. You’re nobody unless you’re putting someone down, telling someone off, putting someone in her/his place.  But here’s another, more provocative, thought: They are uncomfortable that I’ve stepped out of my “place” with my Spinsterlicious “you can be single and happy” message.  Upsetting the status quo makes some people nervous . . . possibly even makes them question their own choices, and so they feel as if I’m stirring up trouble. So in order to keep me down, keep me quiet, keep me in my place, they need to paint me as “other.” Surprisingly, the hecklers appear to include  as many women as men. 

I’m called “selfish” and  “cat lady” (I have no cats) so often that I’ve grown bored with those. I want to respond by asking for something more original.

Here, in italics, are some of the responses Spinsterlicious has attracted, reproduced exactly as written. 

“Sounds like you don’t want to hear the truth. You are selfish, period.”

“Some chick with 14 cats wrote this article.”

A lot of them think I’m angry, delusional, and feel sorry for my sad life.  I really wonder, though, if they’re not secretly envying me.  I have a pretty good life; they’re upset by a woman they don’t even know.  I think I win.

“You are missing out on life.”

“Yes we are all imperfect, but there’s a unique type of imperfection with “hope to die” singles over 40. I think you are all pretty much delusional.  Big Mama said that there is a lid for every pot. You guys are not capable of give and take. You refuse to share. It’s your way or the highway. Sorry, but you are wrong and you are not enjoying life to the fullest. Your life looks like a response to this corrupt and sin-sick society we live in. It sound like this…nobody loves me…men are pigs…I will walk this life alone. BOO WHOO! What a wimp.”

Lots of people invoke God. Clearly I’m going to hell. I usually wonder: When did saying mean things to people you don’t know became godly? But I know that would start a whole ‘nother firestorm that I’m not really interested in getting into. 

“You are going against God’s order and will rot in hell.”

I’m called a slut a lot.  

“It’s just a euphemism for being sexually promiscuous.”

“It’s better to marry than to burn, you cannot live as a fornicator without the paying the price of eternally being separated from GOD. Ask yourself Is it worth that to live a single sinful life now.”

Funnily enough, I don’t mind the “slut” thing, so maybe I really am going to hell.

And a 14-year-old said this the other day: “You have ugly feet.”

At least I hope it was a 14-year-old. 

So now, as I embark on the process of getting my Spinsterlicious Life book published (coming soon!), I’ll be stepping even further away from what was the safe harbor of the wonderful readers of this blog and the WVFC site, with their funny responses, respectful tone and civil discourse. I’ll be stepping out into the broader public arena, with everything that means. I’m anticipating that most people will still be smart and interesting and respectful as they share their different points of view, but I know there will also be more of those who dislike my message and take pleasure in telling me so in the most unfriendly way.

It’s funny, because I’m not wounded by these insulting comments. Those people don’t know me, so they can’t hurt me. Some of their remarks are actually funny, though I don’t think they’re meant to be. 

I am surprised, though. What is it about my being pleased with my no-husband-no-kids life that troubles them so darn much?  I’m just one chick out here trying to live a good life. And hoping that women in a similar place are doing the same. 

NOTE: Don’t forget to visit The Spinsterlicious Life Shop. They make a statement… and a great gift! 
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This entry was posted in #MenCallMeThings, #PeopleCallMeThings, blog trolls, online harassment, sexism, spinsterlicious, spinsterlicious life, the Crazies. Bookmark the permalink.

46 Responses to I’m Single and Happy…Why Does That Make Them So Mad?

  1. James Taylor says:

    I am a man & I am single. It don’t bother me at all. I’m 45 years old now. I have been engaged. Back when the engagement was off, I realized it was me I had to look in the mirror and look within myself and realized honestly it was me who created the problems. I don’t believe in monogamy. Look at the statistics nowadays. Three out of four marriages end in separation, divorce. In the old days people gathered in small groups and you picked someone out got married and you stayed with that person until death do you part.
    In a world of over a billion people it’s hard to find a person who share the same interests as you. One may dislike something you like the other may like the same thing you like. Honestly I believe you can love more than one person. Another reason why I’m single is because I am difficult to live with . I am very moody, self-centered & selfish.
    In a relationship it’s all about give and take. Being single don’t bother me because I’m a loner anyway. I enjoy being alone. Now I’m older I don’t have the patience & understanding that is needed to be in a marriage or relationship.

  2. Rosemarie says:

    I appreciate your web site and I enjoy reading your articles. I think how you choose to express yourself is fantastic! You look vibrant! I have been single for most of my life and I haven’t stopped living my life because of it! Sure I have had some adventures in dating. I’ve met some interesting men, but mostly it helped me see more clearly what was important to me. I do yearn for having a deeper connection with a mate one day, enjoying shared interests and growing together. But I’ve also come to learn being in a relationship does not determine my worth. Ever since I was a child, I cherished my solitude and independence because of who I am–creative, sensitive, spiritual, lover of life, animals and nature. I didn’t always “fit in” and the social stigma of relationship status could have made me feel worse about myself. Being single so far has been enriching and rewarding in so many ways simply because I have made it that way. I feel that it was destined, at least maybe for the time being, that a greater part of my life was spent outside of a committed relationship or marriage. I’ve grown a lot and my self-esteem has a stronger foundation. It’s a different kind of love challenge. Each kind of relationship has it’s own, and we cannot exclude the challenge of learning to love oneself. How many women and men of my previous generation had the chance to discover that in they way they wanted? I’m just turning 41, and I feel even better than I felt in my 20s. All those emotions of anxiety or angst about what others think are losing their grip. When you reach a point where you don’t feel you’re “lacking” or feeling “needy” for love, I think that gives you a great feeling of peace and in turn creates magnetism that welcomes true and healthy relationships in your life.

  3. Tamara says:

    In the future, politely but firmly respond, JESUS was single. Enough said. Why do you suppose there were married and single people in the bible, Apostle Paul, you know the guy who wrote most of the new testament. Everything isn’t for everyone. You are living the path and I am living my path. So why must you inflict your will in my life? The bible is very blunt with that and it is called witchcraft. Drops microphone, exit stage right.

  4. Sharon says:

    Hi from Sharon:
    I stumbled across your blog while reading information about single women over 40. I am a never married woman over 45 with no kids. I am content the way that I am. I am happy to see that you are content with your life as a single, childfree woman. Some people are just jealous because they are in a bad marriage with kids and have no freedom. You can go and come as you please and not have to worry about a husband or kids. I think that being single and child free is a great choice. Also, I am a Christian and the Bible does not condemn singleness. Just check out 1st Corinthians chapter 7. I feel sorry for people who think that EVERYONE should get married and have kids. Live your life the way that you like and just ignore those ignorant jealous haters.

  5. Anonymous says:

    You know, I suppose I'd be angry with you too, if I were stuck with a husband and kids (that I didn't want) for the rest of my life. But I don't think you're committing a sin by being single, happily, no less. I'm a bit of a Bible thumper, myself, so I think I can say that.

  6. Melissa says:

    Hi blogger friend,
    I entered I'm single and happy in a google search and your name popped up! I am single and I am happy I am a woman with no children and I like everyone but I am happy to be with my dogs. And my plants. To fight my loneliness I am growing many species of plants so that I can get a better return on my investment with the positive energy I always put out for others but get static in return. Hold your head up high if you are single not all times will be happy but know that I love you and God loves you and if it takes one person to start a trend let it be us single women with the evenness to devote to whatever it is WE choose! Power to us single women!

  7. Anonymous says:

    I really do enjoy your blog bc it reminds me of my younger days in college, i'm 27 and engaged now. I can argue both ways, however, with age we (women) i think can change our minds especially when we meet someone. In a million years it never even crossed my mind and I quite frankly didn't care to find “the one”. But I always noticed friends who had trouble getting dates had to speak badly of those women who would date and have admirers. There are also those women who could never keep a guy long enough for it to be a relationship so they would retaliate and call guys a jerk. It's perfectly normal to be happy and single but another for it to be an underneath layer of maybe envy for those who are in a commited and happy relationship as well it's not all black and white.

  8. Happiness says:

    Always nice to read your blog.
    Different view and an own opinion about things are happening

  9. zin says:

    I think you are amazing! I wish I knew about this site when I was single. I just learned about it today when Tim (Dax) posted it on FB. Im loving it, and getting the book 🙂
    So many people live their life according to what they “should” do instead of living their life for themselves to be happy. Good for you to have the courage to not “should” all over yourself (carrie bradshaw reference) and live your life on your own terms. Your way!!

  10. Viola says:

    You are single, happy and gifted period!! Do not live to please anybody. That's how i live and am quite ok and happiest.

  11. I'm going to be 40 in a couple of weeks, I've been married, and am now in a relationship where he's living with me. I tell you, I can not wait for him to move out! 🙂 I love living on my own, doing my own thing and not having to justify to anyone else. My ex-husband called me selfish all the time while we were going through our divorce, but isn't it more selfish to stay in a relationship where you aren't giving as much as you are receiving and tying that person up from meeting possibly the love of their life?

  12. Smokie says:

    Any time you are in the public eye, there will be people trying to tear you down. Everyone who's written a book, had a popular blog, been on television, been in public office, etc. has come under fire. It's just the nature of the business. Your only focus is to stay true to yourself and “shake the haters off”. Everyone needs a voice and your voice happens to be the one of “single and happy”. Keep on speaking about it. I'm sure there are many other single and happy women (and men) who enjoy and appreciate what you have to say. My opinion is that those who ridicule you aren't happy in their own lives. I'm married and happy and I enjoy reading your blog and hearing about another happy lifestyle. Maybe it's because I can identify: I was a very happy when I was single, also. Those who enjoy their own lives have no problem when others enjoy THEIR lives as well. This world would be truly boring if everyone lived the same kind of lifestyle.

  13. People are stupid. But you already know that don't you 😉 I admire you for being yourself. You're successful and content and ultimately how we treat people matters so much more than what we have. People who use the bible and other methods to try and beat you down are so unaware of the true meaning in life. I have a few of those in my life. Because I do not choose to live in the way they see fit, every positive thing I do doesn't matter. It's sad that people don't realize we all have unique callings in life.

  14. Jana says:

    oh bikegirl! You made me laugh. I think you are totally right about people who have childred not knowing they had a choice!
    I always thought I would be one of those happy couples with children but I am not and, surprisingly to me, I am quite happy with that. Who knew you could be happy being single!? I have come to believe if you cannot be happy when you are single, why do you think someone else should be responsible for your happiness?

  15. Anonymous says:

    Sometimes it seems that people are even more afraid of single, childless women than any other “alternative” lifestyle. I am glad you are out there showing people another point of view. Don't be deterred by people like them. I am happy to see your comments. Those people are obviously angry or afraid of something. Good luck with your book! Barbara

  16. bikegirl says:

    “I question anybody who has to go to great lengths to tell people how happy they are.”

    You must have a really miserable life if you think that someone saying they're happy actually means they're miserable and trying to cover it up.
    To me, the author of this blog comes across as happy and confident.
    You come across as a miserable troll who has to drag other people down to your level because you can't stand it when other people are happy.

  17. bikegirl says:

    On the childfree forum I hang out at, we speculate that they get angry at you when you say you've chosen not to have children because they didn't realize they had a choice. I think maybe it's a similar thing happening when people get angry at you for not being married, and still being happy. When nearly 50% of marriages end in divorce, there are obviously a lot of UNhappily married people out there.
    So many people follow the life script and have no idea they actually have a say in whether or not they get married, or whether or not they have kids. I think it's a shock to them to find out that they do indeed have a choice.

  18. Anonymous says:

    I am 29, single, childfree, and happier than I've ever been in my life. Your blog serves as an inspiration to me that there are other ladies out there who know that being themselves is enough. Thank you! 🙂

  19. Anonymous says:

    Another person comes to my mind is the late Mrs. Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis’ longtime spokeswoman and confidante, Nancy Tuckerman During the nearly 60-year friendship between Mrs. Onassis and the woman she called “Tucky” began when they were classmates at Miss Chapin’s School in New York City. Tuckerman was Jackie’s social secretary at the White House, and then served for three decades as the person who shielded the fiercely private former First Lady from the press. Mrs. Onassis rewarded her loyal friend – at age 65 yrs. Old and never married – by leaving “Tucky” $250,000, and naming her as the administrator of the charitable foundation set up by Jackie’s estate.

  20. MissWissa says:

    The snarky comments say alot more about the person writing them than they ever will about you and the way you brush it off likely has them crawling up the wall because you refuse to engage in their petty game. You go girl !

  21. Anonymous says:

    Excellent writing. I enjoyed all that I have read along with the comments. I, too, am single with no children or pets, and even no CAR!

  22. Anonymous says:

    As a Catholic we believe in three different Vocations- most people are called to marriage, some people are called to serve God exclusively (ie nuns/monks/priests) and some are called to remain single. All three types have their role in society. I think it is a healthy view to have. My family and friends don't give me crap about being single because everyone is called to a different Vocation.

  23. Amanda says:

    I too am a single girl. I have come against these types of comments as well. But my feeling is that most people get married because the are supposed to get married, not because they particularly want to get married. I don't understand how being single is selfish? Wouldn't it be selfish to have a relationship for other peoples reasons and make each other unhappy.

    As for the children part of the conversation, I don't feel that it is selfish that I don't want a child. My mother didn't want children and didn't spend much time trying to hide that fact. I was raised knowing that she wished her life were different, feeling that she didn't love me. Feeling blamed for the way her life turned out. I would hope that if I had a child I wouldn't treat them that way, but why risk it? I have nieces and nephews that I can be with and love and spoil…and then go home. I enjoy being a part of their lives, but also separate.

    I have a friend that got married young and they are sickeningly perfect together. They have been married 11 years and still act like newlyweds. I am happy for her. But she says things sometimes that offend me. Her favorite is “I was nothing without him”…I know she means that her relationship has enriched her life, but I still bristle when she says it. I feel as though I am something, I have my own interests and can make it on my own…so I am not currently “nothing”. We have stopped talking about the marriage vs. single lives because she is SO happy to be married and I am equally happy to be single.

  24. I suspect it's the most miserable among us who are upset by the happiness of others. Good job on simply scraping those unkind comments off.

  25. Molly says:

    Haha props to you my dear! This is the first I've read your blog, but I'm pleased to do so.

    I'm 26 and single, and love it, and no one looks down on me for it. Rather, they look down on me if I allude to hopefulness of marriage someday. I'm too young to settle, evidently. Do you mind if I ask – how old are you? Just give me a decade.

    I hope that no matter my age or my situation that I'm always content with it. Props to you for knowing what you want and letting the world turn on its own. 🙂

  26. Missy says:

    How amusing! It's great that you can laugh off such silliness. Keep up the real in life's great reality show.

  27. TypeA says:

    Wow, this irritates me (the crazies)…

    To the person who wrote about you “putting your happiness in their face” – it's called freedom of speech and blogging is for folks who want to share their stories.

    Everyone is entitled to an opinion however; if you can't stand the fact that the owner of this blog is single and happy and wants to share lifes adventures with others like her, then don't come back and read the damn thing.

  28. shelley says:

    El, I think your blog is;

    F – fun
    I – informative
    E – entertaining
    R – relevant (to me)
    C – contains great messages
    E – exciting to read!

    Kudos to you!

  29. Liz Hiles says:

    This is so humorous to me. Although I am younger than you, I have gotten those kinds of comments…even from the teens I work with! I love kids, I love WORKING with kids, I love being an aunt to my nieces and my friends' kids, but I DO NOT want my own! I've even been called selfish by someone I was dating, who didn't want more kids, BECAUSE I didn't want kids! There is nothing wrong with knowing my limits. The young people I work with everyday challenge my patience daily…even the awesome ones that I love dearly! I cannot imagine having to deal with the responsibilities of being a parent 24/7/365….I'd end up wearing orange for the rest of my life somewhere “upstate!” And the “you're missing out on life” comments ALWAYS surprise me because that's EXACTLY how I feel about people who are parents!!!! THEY are the ones missing out on life by being tied down to taking care of other people before themselves for 18+ years! There is more to life than coupling and reproduction….way the H*LL more! And, what's more, is I very rarely have the time to reply to a blog that I regularly follow, even if I have something to say on the subject…and I almost always have something to say….so WHY would these obnoxious breeders take the time out to read YOUR blog, which they obviously disagree with and have no interest in incorporating into their lives take so much time and energy to comment on what YOU write?!?!? It's called maturity and they obviously don't have any…get a life and move on! Thank you for writing and sharing your life with all of us…it gives some of us younger spinsterlicious women hope for the path(s) we are choosing. Keep on rockin' it out! ~36 year old in Cincinnati

  30. Rhona says:

    I will tell you what is bothering people about our choice of life! they are mainly jealous. Sorry, but it has to be said. I get similar things shot at me also but not as nasty (those comments are just as pathetic as the people who left them if you ask me). But, I have had people who are in couples and have kids tell me they are envious of my carefree lifestyle. This really makes me angry. Everyone makes their choices in life. I don't go around critizing married people who who do they think they are to make fun of our lifestyle?! Also, it is clear in the Bible that God said not every single person will be coupled off. And, yeah, I don't think you will go to hell if you choose not to marry! What kind of logic is that. And, being single does not mean slutty (very exhausting). Personally I don't have sex and have no desire for it but bc I am single, people think I am with a new man every night. Maybe that is their fantasy but not mine. Ugh, this post (the reason behind it) makes me so angry bc it is truly unfair.

  31. Anonymous says:

    Jesus was single. Paul was single. What I fine tiresome is people STILL cannot believe or accept everything isn't for everyone. It you are married, God bless and may heaven smile upon you. If you are single, God bless and may heaven smile upon you. You know humans do possess envy, you may be experiencing something they are not currently not. It's not like you are asking for a tax exemption.

  32. Stella says:

    Have been musing and needed to come back and say more! Amongst the plethora of (often boring) mommy bloggers your blog was a lovely beacon of light and hope for me.
    There's thousands of blogs out there that your detractors can go and read if they don't like yours. I think it indicates very poor manners to comment and tell you so.
    Ignore them, keep writing.
    xx Stella

  33. Stella says:

    Oh wow! Kinda makes you feel good that you've “stirred the possum” so to speak! Good to know that other people really know how you feel, not you!
    It's funny that so many people are threatened by you. Maybe you could run for government? How cool would that be?
    Anyway, keep up the good work!
    Stella xx

  34. MissiE says:

    Thank you for your blog! I appreciate the time, energy and effort that you forth to share about a lifestyle that many of us have choosen.

  35. Lorelai says:

    I'm so glad you don't let it get to you. The only people with truly disconcerting issues are the ones writing that garbage about you. You're glorious! It's wonderful that you were wise enough to carve out a path that makes you happy. Sticking to life decisions you value emphatically proves what a better person you are!

    P.S. I'm so excited that you're authoring a book!!

  36. Annabelle says:

    Some of those comments really say so much more about the commenters than they do about you, and I'm sure the commenters don't realize that!

    It's one of life's mysteries why some people can be SO BOTHERED by other people's private lives. My life is not particularly far off the well-trodden path, but I still know exactly the kind of comments you're talking about. The amount of flak my friends who are married but choosing not to have kids have gotten is really insane. Does anyone really have kids for the purpose of saving the universe?

    Good for you for being open about being happy with your life!

  37. Janine says:

    This is one reason why I've shied away from blogging, despite getting the urge at times. I do think it's brave, given that toxic culture of which you speak. So many sick puppies out there, hiding behind the mask of online anonymity. And I agree society is massively irked by any rocking of the boat and challenging of the status quo. I work for Australian Woman's Day, aimed at a traditional female readership, and this message is hammered home with every feature I sub-edit. Celebs are all 'party girls' until they become mummies, at which point they are 'happy at last'.

    I urge you to read (if you haven't already) a recent book by another blogger, Brianna Karp, who writes about being homeless and being brought up Jehovah's. It delves into the issue about being exposed once the media latch on, and taking that to the next level with a book. I haven't finished reading it yet, but so far, it's a warts-and-all eye-opener.

    Please continue to write honestly about the feedback once the book's released, and congrats on that huge achievement. And, controversially, I truly believe it's an EVEN BIGGER achievement than, say, getting pregnant, which is touted as the greatest achievement of all. At least in certain magazines…

  38. Anonymous says:

    Love your blog! I think your detractors can't believe that you have the temerity to be happy without a husband and kids. How dare you?

  39. Anonymous says:

    **I can do this all night. Not sure you want to be known as one of those bloggers who only allows positive comments.

    I find posts like this to be transparent pleas for attention and adulation. The Bible Thumpers and obvious McTrolls aside, you do get some comments that are thought provoking in their dissent. To lump them all in together as being from “crazies” feels like bravado. The truth is, I question anybody who has to go to great lengths to tell people how happy they are.

    Upsetting the status quo makes some people nervous

    Hmmm. I don't think you're upsetting anything. I think there are thousands upon thousands of women out there content being single. It's the ones who take to the Internet and have to remind everybody how happy they are that I doubt.

    What is it about my being pleased with my no-husband-no-kids life that troubles them so darn much?

    I don't think it troubles people. I think that's you trying to make yourself seem far more influential and provocative than you actually are.

    I think people feel you're disingenuous. You said it yourself. You have a “reasonably” pleasant personality. Maybe you're not so much single by choice as you are single by circumstance? That's what people are questioning. I've read some of your stories and, to be honest, you can come across rather unpleasant and entitled when it comes to men and dating.

    It's funny, because I'm not wounded by these insulting comments.

    Then why devote a whole post to these comments? This is why you come off as disingenuous to me. Any blogger who has to write a labored post about a comment or comments she receives, and then claim that she wasn't affected by it is lying, plain and simple. These words affected you enough to write a missive. And now all of your readers will come in and tell you how fab you are, drowning out the voices of dissent. Even those that might be in your head.

    It's great that you're comfortable where you're at in life. But maybe you got here not because you were just so damn happy being alone but because you rejected or repelled some very decent, attractive, kind men.

    You do yourself and the women who read this blog a great disservice by not examining that kind of feedback more deeply.

    • Tracy says:

      Your post is very thoughtful but I respectfully disagree. The author seems very rational and level headed to me. As you point out there are probably thousands upon thousands of not-married, no-kids women out there; but seriously we don’t all know each other. It would be nice if we did and I think this blog is a way to corral these like minded women. This author has given us a forum to do so. Personally, I am delighted with my (recently) not married, no children status. I love hearing that other women do to.

  40. Anonymous says:

    People who aren't comfortable making their own decisions, generally aren't comfortable with those of us that do.

    “Never judge another person's life until you've walked a day in it.”

  41. Not Tellin' says:

    It's amazing that many of your detractors think you're selfish for not wanting kids. I know people who would make the opposite argument– that having a kid in these times of global upheaval and environmental decline is selfish–that having a kid when there are so many kids languishing in foster care is selfish, etc., etc. I think when you listen to the nastiness of our political campaigns and the stupid pundits who make millions spreading incendiary misinformation, it's not a stretch that Spinsterlicious would be a threat. Hey, they want to define a family and not allow gay people get married, right?

  42. TypeA says:

    I think I've read a few of those comments and chose to be quiet rather than put them in their place. It's not worth one's energy to banter back and forth with such ignorance and jealousy.

    I would agree a lot of the people who respond like that ARE jealous of the fact that you are living the life YOU want and not one dictated by the choosing of a husband or children. Many women resent that their lives are no longer theirs when they marry and reproduce however; since this is what society dictates this is what one does. Most wouldn't feel comfortable with the decision of “a path less traveled”.

    I'm with you 100%, I do not let society dictate how I live my life and, as all my married friends will tell you, they live vicariously through me and my life's adventures.

    -Not mad at all

  43. LisaM says:

    One of the best things about your blog – so many people lead wonderful lives that they never even acknowlege because they spend all their time dwelling on “my life could be better if only…” (fill in with whatever). I was totally doing that until my 20-something daughter pointed it out to me. Gosh, she was right. I've spent a very happy handful of years since then, realizing how blessed and great my right now right here life is. You do the same thing, and it is refreshing and energizing!! Keep it up!

  44. Anonymous says:

    I read another (one of many) blogs, this one by a fairly well-known mommy-blogger. In her posts she alludes to her detractors often, in a humorous way. Sometimes she will post their vitriole when it's particularly amusing or grammatically incorrect, usually accompanied by multiple spelling errors. It's the same as what you describe. It would seem that the anonymity of the Internet leads people to writ mean things. Except I think some of them, especially the Bible thumpers, say out loud what they write in blog comments. It's a sad reality for bloggers that gain noteriety. As a regular reader (and spinsterlicious woman myself) I'm pleased that it won't stop you from writing.

  45. April says:

    What I don't understand is why it's worth their time to tell you to get a life?
    Glad that you can laugh them off. Comments like that definitely say more about them than about you.
    And can't wait for your book!

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